Ever since learning that his teams game on Halloween was a 2:00 day game, Mike Fisher of the Ottawa Senators has done nothing but describe how thrilled he is to be able to go trick or treating after the game . “Oh man its great, now I get to go trick or treating with Carrie,” said Fisher [...]
Entries from October 2009
October 30, 2009
Colorado Avalanche Players Getting A Little Carried Away With Comparison to Real Avalanche
Ever since analyst Keith Jones said that their start to the season has reminded him of a real Avalanche, Avs players have started to take the comparison a little too seriously. “Holy shit, did you see how we came down the mountain with power and fury and crushed our opponents?” asked captain Adam Foote as he [...]
October 28, 2009
Snipe of the Year
If there is a guy with a better shot in the NHL than Alex Semin I’d like to know who it is. I used to to think Kovalchuk had the best release but i’ve changed my mind. The way Emery barely even moved his glove before the puck was in the net is like the [...]
October 26, 2009
Pierre McGuire Comments on His Sex Life
In another DKM exclusive report, we were able to sit down with one of Canada’s most polarizing sports figures, Pierre McGuire. While many look forward to Pierre’s energetic and frenetic broadcasts, there is a contingent of haters out there. I’m hoping that these negative opinions of Pierre are not rigidly set, and may change after [...]
October 26, 2009
Slovenian National Team Still Needs 17 More Players
Slovenian born winger Anze Kopitar of the Los Angeles has gotten off to a blazing start this year as he currently leads the NHL in scoring, and has all but secured hismelf a spot on his country’s national team. Kopitar is the only Slovenian to ever be drafted and play in the NHL but with his recent [...]
October 22, 2009
Marc-Andre Bergeron Claims He Was Hit By Gordie Howe
After suffering a likely concussion on a devastating check from Colby Armstrong of the Atlanta Thrashers, Montreal defensemen Marc-Andre Bergeron was questionably allowed to return to the ice in Tuesday night’s game between the Thrashers and Canadiens. Minutes after the blow that left Bergeron in a semi-conscious state, the blue-liner identified 81 year old hockey [...]
October 20, 2009
Tampa Bay Lightning Strip Shootout
Hey Guys and Dolls. How was your offseason? Well, Your Big Aristotle is back. Bookmark it. To kick things off, a naked Martin St. Louis, enjoy. This is why the lightning suck frozen ass.
October 20, 2009
Entire NHL Takes Sunday Off To Watch Football
For the second straight week the National Hockey League decided not to schedule any games so that all of the leagues players and employees could watch Sunday’s action from the NFL. Comissioner Gary Bettman confirmed that he will continue to decide mid-week if he will schedule any games on Sunday depending on whether or not there is a good [...]
October 14, 2009
Brian Burke is a Racist
As the Toronto Maple Leafs continue to dig a deep hole to open their season, DKM has stumbled across some disturbing news involving Leafs General Manager Brian Burke. I’ve done a little homework on the facts, and it looks like Burkie harbours a genuine aversion towards natives of South Korea. Case in point: he refuses [...]
October 12, 2009
The Weekly 5
Top 5 most exciting moments from the past week in the NHL. 5. Buffalo super pest Patrick Kaleta smokes Petr Prucha of the Coyotes 4. Dany Heatley notches a hat trick in his first home game with the Sharks. 3. Brent Johnson with an early save of the year candidate. 2. Alex Semin turns Braydon [...]
October 9, 2009
Unlikely Fights
The ideas are flowing faster than the salmon of Capistrano and the Bench Boss has come up with another fun and exciting segment that he would like to become a mainstay here at Distinct Kicking Motion. This one, as the title explains, will feature a fight between two unlikely combatants or perhaps just one unlikely [...]
