Monthly Archives: November 2009
Keith Ballard Murders Tomas Vokoun
In tonight’s game between the Florida Panthers and the Atlanta Thrashers, Florida defeceman Keith Ballard frusturated at his teams goalie Tomas Vokoun for allowing a goal, swung his stick as hard as he could at Vokoun’s head killing the 33 … Continue reading
Filed under The Bench Boss
Hayley Wickenheiser Molests Dane Phaneuf
Team Canada’s women’s hockey team recently played a group of 15-year old boys in an effort to tune up for the upcoming Olympic competition. The game will be best remembered for an incident involving Canadian captain Hayley Wickenheiser (above), who … Continue reading
Filed under Offensive Defenceman
Ryan Kesler and Mathieu Schneider Enjoy Candlelit Thanksgiving Dinner
Ryan Kesler and Mathieu Schneider, the only American born players on the Vancouver Canucks roster, had what was described as a very romantic Thanksgiving dinner together Wednesday night. The Canucks will be celebrating the American holiday tonight by taking on … Continue reading
Filed under The Bench Boss
Unlikely Fights
The Bench Boss is coming at you with another installment of Unlikely Fights. After a slow start we are starting to see more of these rare sightings and last night we may have seen the most unlikely fight to date. … Continue reading
Filed under The Bench Boss
Detroit Red Wings Request Death Penalty
In Saturday nights game between the Montreal Canadians and Detroit Red Wings, Habs forward Georges Laraque put a questionable hit on Wings defenceman Nicklas Kronwall who is now expected to miss more than a month of hockey. Rather than appeal … Continue reading
Filed under The Bench Boss
Scott Niedermayer: Good Samaritan Gone Wrong
There might not be a funnier moment in hockey this year than what went down after the Ducks-Lightning game last night. Watch as Scott Niedermayer tosses his stick into the stands and sets off a melee between a good 10 … Continue reading
Filed under The Bench Boss
Comrades Checking In
We here at Distinct Kicking Motion were able to obtain exclusive recordings from a phone conversation that took place earlier today between Russian superstars Alexander Ovechkin and Evgeni Malkin. Both have recently returned from injuries, and have already impacted their … Continue reading
Filed under Offensive Defenceman
Taylor Or Tyler
The question that will be asked over and over again until the 2010 NHL draft approaches will be who should the number one overall pick be, Taylor or Tyler? As in Taylor Hall of the Windsor Spitfires and Tyler Seguin of … Continue reading
Filed under The Bench Boss
Unlikely Fights
For the third time this season the Bench Boss is coming at you with another unlikely fight from the National Hockey League. This one is a little different in the way that the two combatants, Ryan Getzlaf and Bill Guerin, … Continue reading
Filed under The Bench Boss
Rich Peverley’s Mom Asks What Number He Is
After watching two periods of her son’s game, the mother of Altana Thrashers forward Rich Peverley kindly turned to the person sitting next to her and asked “do you happen to know what number Rich Peverley is?” Much to her surprise … Continue reading
Filed under The Bench Boss
GM Meeting Turns Into Wild Sex Party
Thanks to Darren Dreger of TSN, yours truly was able to snag a spot in the board room as the league’s general managers met for day 2 of the annual meeting, and what started out as your every day workplace gathering … Continue reading
Filed under The Bench Boss
