The next great Yankee?
A day after Florida Panthers defenceman Keith Ballard accidentally slashed his own goalie Tomas Vokoun in the head, all the much maligned rearguard could talk about was how he hoped that George Steinbrenner, owner and vice president of the New York Yankees saw the incident. ”Man, if Steinbrenner sees that swing I gurantee he’ll be impressed,” Ballard told reporters regarding the now famous incident from Tuesday night. “I know they probably aren’t gonna re-sign Matsui so they are gonna need a new DH. It’s always been a side dream of mine to play pro ball, and I’ve always thought I could be the next Bo Jackson or Deion Sanders with the whole two sport athlete thing.”
If you aren’t aware of what happened, in the first period of the Panthers 3-2 loss to the Atlanta Thrashers, Ballard who was frusturated at a goal that had been scored on Vokoun, swung his stick in anger trying to hit the post, but instead caught Vokoun in the head. Vokoun laid motionless on the ice for several minutes and had to be carried off on a stretcher. After the game Ballard was reportedly inconsolable and refused to talk to the media, but a day later he had clearly changed his tone. “Yeah, I was a little upset at first, but once I heard that Tommy was ok I moved on to more important things, such as trying to send a tape of my swing style to the Yankees front office. Look, if you slow it down enough you can easily see that it meets all the requirements of a perfect swing,” said Ballard as he showed the footage to a room full of reporters. ”Firstly, my pre-swing is near perfection: front shoulder and chin are tucked in, my hands are back, and my head is still. Then, the rest is simply a thing of beauty: I stayed on top of the ball, got the bat-head out in front, and then delivered a fluent follow through. Crack! And there you have it, the perfect swing.”
Ballard says he will now wait to field offers from big league clubs but knows in his heart that there is only one team for him. “Ever since the other day I have dreamed about putting on the pinstripes and after the potential I showed, they would be crazy to pass up on talent like this. I fully expect to be slotted in the five hole come opening day, and if I can hit the ball with the same power and conistency that I have shown to be able to do with goalie’s heads, then I wouldn’t be surprised to find myself in the all-star game, or even challenge for the MVP.”
