Team Canada’s 2010 Olympic hockey squad was revealed yesterday, and there has been the usual backlash of criticism and controversy regarding some of the selections. TSN’s coverage of the selected players (and the omitted ones) can be found by clicking here. Before we get into the reactions of players around the league, here’s a list of the team as well as some notable exceptions.
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Forwards: PATRICE BERGERON (Boston), SIDNEY CROSBY (Pittsburgh), RYAN GETZLAF (Anaheim), DANY HEATLEY (San Jose), JAROME IGINLA (Calgary), PATRICK MARLEAU (San Jose), BRENDEN MORROW (Dallas), RICK NASH (Columbus), MIKE RICHARDS (Philadelphia), COREY PERRY (Anaheim), ERIC STAAL (Carolina), JOE THORNTON (San Jose), JONATHAN TOEWS (Chicago)
Defence: DAN BOYLE (San Jose), DREW DOUGHTY (Los Angeles), DUNCAN KEITH (Chicago), SCOTT NIEDERMAYER (Anaheim), CHRIS PRONGER (Philadelphia), BRENT SEABROOK (Chicago), SHEA WEBER (Nashville)
Goaltenders: MARTIN BRODEUR (New Jersey), MARC-ANDRE FLEURY (Pittsburgh), ROBERTO LUONGO (Vancouver)
NOTABLE EXCEPTIONS
MIKE GREEN (Washington), DION PHANEUF (Calgary), JAY BOUWMEESTER (Calgary), CAM WARD (Carolina), JEFF CARTER (Philadelphia), SHANE DOAN (Phoenix), RYAN SMYTH (Los Angeles), VINCENT LECAVALIER (Tampa Bay), MARTIN ST. LOUIS (Tampa Bay), STEVE STAMKOS (Tampa Bay), CURTIS JOSEPH (Retired)
- Gritty winger Ryan Smyth was devastated that he was left off of Canada’s squad
The players taking rejection the hardest seemed to be Shane Doan and Ryan Smyth, two staples of Canada’s international hockey team for the past decade. Both players have been referred to as “Captain Canada” at some time or another due to their unwavering passion while wearing the red maple leaf on their jersey. Smyth, who has battled an injury lately started off the season at a point-per-game pace with the Kings, and had his heart set on putting on the red jersey in Vancouver this February. However, Smyth remained optimistic, noting that his Kings play against the Boston Bruins twice before the Olympics begin: “I know Patrice [Bergeron] has a history of head injuries. If you don’t think I’m going to take a shot at him with a flying elbow, or even a crosscheck to his face, then you’re underestimating my passion for my country. I’ll kill to be on this sqaud! I bleed Canadian red baby!!” Smyth then took his skates out of his hockey bag, and proceeded to carve his wrists and arms up. As blood poured down to the floor of the Los Angeles locker room, Smyth continued shouting “Red blood, baby, red blood!!” before succumbing to the loss of blood and passing out on Anze Kopitar’s lap.
- Vincent Lecavalier (left) instructing teammate Steven Stamkos to stop trying
The trio of players from Tampa Bay – Lecavalier, Stamkos, and St. Louis – were also quite dejected. Lecavalier said, “I actually kinda thought all three of us would make it on the team. To not even have one of us, I’m shocked. Maybe I should have actually tried for the first half of this season.” Stamkos overheard this comment, and disagreed. “You guys saw how hard I tried to start this season. Hell, I was leading the league in everything at one point. But look, effort gets you no reward – remember that kids.” St. Louis, on the other hand, took the disappointment in stride. “Hif dee Holympics were in Montreal, right by my ‘ometown, den I would be disappointed. But, I ‘aven’t been good for hat least tree years now. Good luck to dee players that made hit.”
- Steve Yzerman admits “not trying too hard” while selecting Team Canada
The man who set up the team, Steve Yzerman, responded to the comments regarding the absence of the Tampa players from the squad. Yzerman admitted, “Yeah, okay, I didn’t actually go watch a Tampa Bay game all season. I had no clue about Stamkos’ start until someone brought it up five minutes ago. And Vinny (Lecavalier), geez sorry about that man. I seriously forgot about you playing down there. It’s just… so far South.” Yzerman proceeded to come clean on a few other players who didn’t make the cut. “Yeah, I actually didn’t do any scouting for those teams in the South. I thought the Kings and Coyotes folded or became minor league teams, so I apologize to Smythers and Doaner.” A savvy reporter pointed out that the Canadian squad did have numerous players from Southern-based teams, to which Yzerman responded: “Yeah, I asked Mike (Babcock – coach of Team Canada and the Detroit Red Wings) who some good players were that he’s coached against. He told me about that line from San Jose, so I said what the hell, let’s bring them all aboard. I tried to bring in Bobby Ryan too so he could play with Perry and Getzlaf, but apparently he’s not Canadian, so that sucked.” Reporters continued to attack Yzerman’s selections, particularly that of Kings’ defenceman Drew Doughty after Yzerman admitted to have forgotted about the Kings. “Okay okay okay,” Yzerman began, “I actually wanted that Jay Boobmister or whatever, but no one knew how to actually spell his name for the back of the jersey. We can’t have that. Then one of my assistants, I think it was Kevin (Lowe) said that he heard about a young kid who had a last name that looked like “Doughy.” The thought of having a dough-boy on the team made me laugh, so I made sure we signed him up. Luckily somebody knew who the kid was.”
- Duncan Keith’s excitement was contagious, so Yzerman brought Seabrook onboard
Chicago Blackhawks defenceman Duncan Keith was amped up when he got the call from Yzerman personally. Yzerman fondly recalls “Duncan was screaming in my ear like a little girl, just dropping f-bombs everywhere. He was so excited that he asked if his good pal could come along too. I asked if this guy was Canadian, and Duncan said he was pretty sure that he was. So, that’s how I replaced Mike Green with Brent Seabrook. Who needs the fastest-skating defenceman in the game? We’ll be in Canada, so it’s a smaller rink. Green’s speed will be neutralized easily, and I think he’d be inneffective, just like in the NHL.” Green leads all NHL defencemen in points, shots, and is in the top 4 in goals, assists, +/-, and powerplay points. Green’s only response was a text, sent to TSN super-broadcaster James Duthie, which read, “Fuck Brent Seabrook.”
Sidney Crosby was named an assistant captain to the 2010 squad, and he seems intent on being a leader for this squad despite his youth. “Well, we just have to work hard, stick to the gameplan that Coach makes, give 110%, and execute. Hopefully, we’ll catch a few bounces and come out on top.” Jonathan Toews, also a young player who has assumed a leadership role with his NHL squad, reiterated Crosby’s comments, adding, “Each game is going to be a battle from start to finish, but we’ll do a fuckin’ great job.”
The only surprise in net was that retired goaltender Curtis Joseph was once again omitted from the Canadian Olympic roster. CuJo was quick to post some harsh words on his blog, which read, “This is all part of the continuing conspiracy against me by the Canadian Olympic committee. Steve Yzerman still holds a grudge against me ever since the Red Wings signed me that one year and I totally sucked balls for them in net. Does anyone actually think that Martin Brodeur is a better goaltender than I am? I sure as hell hope not. Roberto Luongo? Please, my dick has more athleticism than you do. And then Marc-Andre Fleury. Wow. A guy with the nickname “Flower”or a guy with the nickname CuJo, I think I know who I would pick going into a fight.”
Stay tuned for continuing coverage as Team Canada prepares for the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver.
