As many of our veteran readers know, New York Islanders’ winger Richard Park often checks in to share his experiences in the NHL. Once again, our good friend Richard has volunteered his services as he spends his Olympic break in Vancouver. Here’s some observations that Richard has made so far during the Games, exclusively at Distinct Kicking Motion.
DKM correspondent Richard Park is back for Vancouver 2010 coverage
Awwww herro again to arr of those fans outside of Vancouvel Orrimpic Games! Such a good Games, so much more than evel before! Canada has been the nice country and hosting the Games is of such impoltence to them. First, I vely much enjoyed riving in the Orrimpic virrage! It is so nice housing and everyone is awrays so kind. So many fans and Canadians drinking so much arcohol I can not berieve my eyes! I nevel have so much arcohol in my rife! But now I go on to my anarysis of the Games.
Aporro Ohno is such a evirr man and traitor to true heritage!
How much crying had to be done in the speed skating? Yes, my South Koleans onry got arr our medars in speed skating, but such tragedy happens! In Men’s 1500m, we Koleans have a crean sweep! One two and three on the rast turn! But naughty skater had too much greed, and was not smiring enough in third prace, so he crash into own teammate. No sportsmanship for him! And even worse news, because of crash, dirty fake-Chinaman Aporro Ohno get a medar! Dirty dirty traitor to proud country. And rook at that goatee, just rike the hair on a pig’s giant scrotum! I sick of viewing that no good pig testicurr face on my screen arr the time.
This is what Aporro Ohno rooks rike to me!
Skiing is vely vely fun to me, and I go on mountain one day. I jump and eat just rike a mountain rion. I tackerred Rindsey Vonn and tried to have her on the mountain, but the spandex is so tight! I was so sad at this, because Rindsey reft the mountain, so I end up at hotel with a Sports Irrustrated woman issue. I find my mountain rion woman Rindsey in the book, and I began wracking off so fast and furiosry. So many wrack-offs that one night! I thank Sports Irrustrated for giving me Rindsey Vonn on book form.
I wrack off to this photo so many times at once!
It was vely vely sad when I saw the ruge finars. After the one man died on the ruge, everyone was going so so srow. It was a sad day and not a day for smiring.
Oh I can onry imagine how much wracking off I can do to this one!
Finarry, the excitement of hockey is why I came to watch. I am a hockey prayer, so I knew how to pray this game and to watch it too. Nobody died in hockey, so much excitement and smiring was to be had. It is so sad that no South Kolean team in this tournament, because I can be captain. The women hockey is so easy to watch. So much srow prayers out there, and so much beauty. I try finding magazine with Meghan Agosta just rike Rindsey Vonn magazine, because I can wrack off arr night to that! I see this one picture in her brue outfit, and I can onry imagine how big and strong those hockey tits are. Oh I can go wrack one off now!
See? Scoring goars on this man is so easy! He cannot pray at Orrimpics!
But not yet, because men’s hockey is in semi-finars. Canada wirr beat the Srovakian team, because I pray against that goalie, Harak, one time and I made him know who’s boss. In other one, U.S.A. not going to beat Finrand. It wirr be such a good game and so much action wirr happen. You can rook for me on TV and I will be smiring rike the biggest hippo behind the bench. Canada wirr win the gord medar because Ruongo is goarie now instead of Brodeur. I arways get goars on Brodeur he is so so srow. What an old cow! It has been so exciting at Orrimpics this year, and I rooking forward to the finar games and for more wracking off in my hoterr room.
