Not every player in the NHL was lucky enough to play in the Olympics, and were able to enjoy a nice two week break before resuming their season this week. Here is what a few of the Non-Olympians did to pass the time.
Jeff Carter, Philadelphia Flyers: Sat by the phone all hours of the day, but was not heard from by anyone as he refused to answer the phone unless the caller i.d. came up as “Steve”.
Mikael Samuelsson, Vancouver Canucks: Attended all Sweden games dressed in a Wizard costume complete with a wand in which he used to cast spells against his home country’s team.
Steve Stamkos, Tampa Bay Lightning: Replaced Sidney Crosby with himself on Team Canada’s roster in the NHL 10 video game, kept himself on the ice for the entire game, and made sure he scored every goal inlcluding the overtime winner in the gold medal game.
Alex Kovalev, Ottawa Senators: Retreated to his native Russia for some nice R and R, but reportedly couldn’t wait to return to North America and make more millions of dollars.
Chris Chelios, Chicago Wolves: Could be heard constantly mocking the U.S. defence, saying that they were like cupcakes who would only get better if they had “a little Cheli sprinkled on top”.
Cotlon Orr, Toronto Maple Leafs: Practiced his stick, gloves, and shirt routine in case he was called upon to punch an opposing player in the face, knock him unconcious, and have him hit his head off the ice and then die.
Ken Hitchcock: Originally picked to be a member of the Canadian coaching staff, Hitchcock’s real duty was to make sure the Canadian players didn’t over-eat at team meals. Whenever the coaches would spot a player having too much food on his plate, Hitchcock would sneak up behind him and consume half of the portion and then whisper in his ear “don’t even think about seconds, bitch”.

