NHL commissioner Gary Bettman has proposed a new business plan solution for the cash-strapped Phoenix Coyotes: a severe natural disaster causing graphic images of death and chaos in order to prompt a steady flow of donations from the outside world. “It’s genius,” Bettman stated at a news conference yesterday. “Have you seen how much money Haiti’s received, just out of pity? It’s not like that money is going towards replacing nice homes or furniture or anything like that… No, they had straw huts and bamboo chairs. Imagine the money that would be donated to restore an NHL arena, apartments, hotels, and real homes made of brick and concrete.” Bettman later added that “the cash influx would be off the fucking charts.”
After making two major deals in the last two days, Calgary Flames GM Darryl Sutter vows to now start trading wives of certain players. “Well, we didn’t look very good in the first game with the new players so maybe these guys need something that will really wake them up. Maybe once they see their wife shipped off to a far away locale they will start putting forth a much stronger effort.” Keep reading →
Cooke denies biting, but admits to disliking indians
In Sunday’s game between the Philadelphia Flyers and the Pittsburgh Penguins, Flyers foward Arron Asham accused Matt Cooke of biting his hand during a skirmish in the third period of Pittsburgh’s 2-1 win. The incident of course struck of major chord with Asham who said that he has no respect for Cooke, but the real issue at hand seems to be that of whether or not Cooke has a problem with Native people. Keep reading →
Mike Danton, in a 2004 photo with the St. Louis Blues
Convicted criminal Mike Danton stepped out in front of the microphones for the first time yesterday, as reported in this story on TSN.ca. After trying to kill someone, be it his agent, David Frost, or his father, Steve Jefferson, Danton is back on the ice with a passion (here’s the 2004 TSN article about Danton’s indictment, which illustrates the confusion as to who he actually wanted to kill). Danton, now 29 years old and almost guaranteed never to play in the NHL again, is approaching his role with the Saint Mary’s University Huskies hockey team with zealous fervor. “Time in the joint makes a man realize what’s important in life,” Danton stated pensively. “All you can do in there is think. You think about what you loved. What you missed the most in the outside world. As a hockey player, I missed all the parties with the boys after games.” After a few more moments, Danton’s eyes glazed over, as if recalling a sweet memory from his youth. “And the broads. I lost six years of hittin’ prime-aged college pussy. Right when it’s the ripest.”
Henrik Sedin, who currently leads the NHL in scoring says he will refuse to win the Art Ross Trophy unless his brother Daniel can win it with him. The Vancouver Canucks centre leads the NHL with 65 points, one point ahead of the Sharks Joe Thornton and two ahead of Pittsburgh superstar Sidney Crosby. Sedin admits it would be nice if he could end up with the most points in the league, but says he will not accept the trophy unless his brother also is named as a winner. Keep reading →
After captaining team Canada to a silver medal at the recent World Junior Hockey Championships, Patrice Cormier says he has finally got rid of all the frusturation he was feeling over the disappointing loss. In a game Saturday night between Cormier’s Rouyn-Noranda Huskies and the Quebec Remparts, Cormier caused a scary scene when he hit Remparts defenceman Mikael Tam with an elbow to the head knocking the 18 year old unconcious. Tam quicky began to have convulsions on the ice and had to quickly be removed from the ice surface and rushed to the hospital. Keep reading →
Hello again hockey fans. I interrupt our usual, expertly done, 100% factual reporting on events around the hockey world to bring some video awesomeness into your world. It’s only 18 days into 2010, yet I’ve seen three plays so far that should end up on most of the year-in-review highlights 12 months from now. Two of these goals are similar, as Marian Hossa of the Chicago Blackhawks and Robbie Schremp of the New York Islanders appear to have taken batting practice during the off-season. I’ll argue that Hossa’s was more difficult, as he pulled the trick off while skating. Here’s the two videos, so you can decide for yourself.
Hossa:
Schremp:
Now, the following play isn’t from NHL competition but, rather, the ECHL. The goal itself is not the most spectacular part of the sequence. Rather, it’s just the icing on the cake of a series of dangles that honestly makes the defensive team look like a bunch of 10-year olds flailing helplessly as Sidney Crosby toys with them. Here’s the video (recommendation – follow the whole vid through for some typically classic Onrait-O’Toole bantering following the Highlight of the Night portion):
Hope you enjoyed these beauties. If you come across anything else you feel worthy so far in 2010, post the link in the comments.
It seems that Washington athletes just can’t help themselves from getting into trouble these days. Just weeks after the Gilbert Arenas incident in which the star Wizards guard pulled a gun on a teammate at a practice on Christmas Eve, a Capitals player is now being accused of pulling a Proton gun on a teammate after the teams 7-4 loss to the Tampa Bay Lightning Tuesday night. Keep reading →
Season 9 of the hit TV show American Idol kicked off this week
As American Idol kicked off a new season this week, it appears that Calgary Flames defenceman Dion Phaneuf is preparing for auditions. Amongst his other favourite off-ice activities, such as hanging out in the back room of strip clubs (photo evidence of that later this post), Dion is known for having one of the smoothest singing voices in the NHL. Following the jump is video evidence of Dion’s latest practice session at a local Calgary bar named Aussie Rules, where he belts out Billy Joel’s “Piano Man” with more control and harmony than the original singer himself.
After his Vancouver Canucks lost 3-2 to the Nashville Predators last night, forward Alex Burrows let loose with some pretty candid comments in regards to referee Stephane Auger’s officiating. You can click the link to find out what Burrows said as it is surely going to be a highly talked about controversy for the next few days. http://tsn.ca/nhl/story/?id=305786.
Burrows accused Auger of having a personal vendetta against him and then carrying it out by calling two penalties on him in the third period. Well folks there is more to this story. Yes, we here at DKM are always on the look out for the big scoop, and much like our friends over at TMZ, we were able to dig up more dirt on this situation.
Daniel Ryder, a 3rd round pick of the Calgary Flames in 2005 and the younger brother of Bruins sniper Michael Ryder, was charged with armed robbery after he allegedly held up a convienence store this past Tuesday. Ryder starred with the Peterborough Petes in the Ontario Hockey League where he once won the Wayne Gretzky 99 award which is given to the MVP of the OHL playoffs, and although his future looked bright in the game of hockey, the 22 year old has decided on a much different career path. Keep reading →
The United States Junior team celebrates their 6-5 gold medal victory over Canada
The United States Junior hockey team ended Canada’s gold medal streak at five yesterday, in what was a thrilling 6-5 overtime victory. Many factors were at play in this emotional, back-and-forth game that provided a plethora of excitement at each end of the ice. Neither of the starting goalies appeared to be ready to deal with the pressure, and the U.S. made the first move to pull their starter, Mike Lee, after his third goal allowed. Canadian coach Willie Desjardins allowed Jake Allen to die between the pipes for Canada, in a game where his focus clearly wasn’t sharp. Multiple American goals were on shots that should have been routine saves if Allen was in proper position. In fact, Allen played so poorly that his junior team in the QMJHL has literally traded him from their roster. An unconfirmed report noted that a high-ranking team official for the Montreal Juniors, Allen’s former team, was overheard saying, “we don’t want to have Canada’s national embarassment playing for us every night. No way. Frankly, he was tough to trade… Luckily Drummondville stepped up and offered us a 10-pack of new sticks and a neat little bag to hold our pucks. That will be really convenient after a practice!”
Team Canada head coach Willie Desjardins: traitor to our country?
However, we here at DKM did some digging, and it appears that the loss can’t be put solely on Allen’s shoulders, as there may have been more at play here. Two pressing questions emerged in the wake of the game: 1) Why did Canadian head coach Willie Desjardins leave Allen in the game long after it became evident that the kid wasn’t on? 2) How did the Americans know that Allen would fall to his knees like a two-dollar whore every time they shot, enabling goals upstairs like there was no tomorrow? Well, we have the answer.
January 12, 2010
Alex Burrows Also Accuses Stephane Auger of Cheating at Snakes N’ Ladders
After his Vancouver Canucks lost 3-2 to the Nashville Predators last night, forward Alex Burrows let loose with some pretty candid comments in regards to referee Stephane Auger’s officiating. You can click the link to find out what Burrows said as it is surely going to be a highly talked about controversy for the next few days. http://tsn.ca/nhl/story/?id=305786.
Burrows accused Auger of having a personal vendetta against him and then carrying it out by calling two penalties on him in the third period. Well folks there is more to this story. Yes, we here at DKM are always on the look out for the big scoop, and much like our friends over at TMZ, we were able to dig up more dirt on this situation.
Keep reading →
Leave a Comment
Filed under The Bench Boss
Tags: Alex Burrows, Alex Burrows and Stephane Auger, Alex Burrows comments, Stephane Auger